If you've been paying any attention to the news at all this week you will have seen that an earthquake of staggering magnitude pulverised a large part of Haiti.  The news coverage is shocking, the devastation immense.  Unfortunately, such tragic news stories are all too common place in our world.  From famine to war we are used to pictures of suffering entering our homes via the box in our living room.

I think we can all be forgiven if on occasion we feel slightly immune to what is happening.  Its too far away, its too great a tragedy to comprehend, it doesn't touch us personally.

I confess when I first saw the pictures, I was utterly guilty of skipping past them with a quick "Poor Haiti, hurricanes last year, earthquakes this year, they can't catch a break".  I'm certain I wasn't the only one. 

It probably would have remained just that for me, another tragedy somewhere in the world, but then my phone rang on Tuesday night.

By the cruelest of cruel twists of fate a friend from the past, who should have left the island the day before, was found in the wreckage of his building on Tuesday morning.  Nearly half way around the world his wife will be explaining to their baby that his father isn't coming home this week and in fact won't be coming home again.

Yesterday, after our little group of friends connected themselves again by phone, by e-mail, by thought across the globe, I pulled down my photo album.  There in the pages they were, my friends smiling up at the camera from a huge group hug around a dinner table.  Blissfully in love, several months from marriage, years from their baby being born and the tragedy lurking in the distance.  They were the fairy tale love story.  I know this, because I helped introduce them.  I was there when they bounced starry eyed from their first date absolutely convinced in love at first sight because it had now happened to them. 

As with many expat friendships, time and distance stretched between us with only sporadic news coming from mutual friends.  Nevertheless I am devastated for them.  That life could be so unutterably cruel.  I am shocked to my core that now two people are gone from my photo album, less than eight years after it was compiled and way, way before their time.

If you have any spare change this month, please consider donating it to one of the relief appeals for Haiti.  I will be doing so for a little boy whose memories of his father will now only be the memories of other people, in the hope that another family may be saved from such heartache.

In the Netherlands you can donate through Giro555.

I feel like I have 101 photos to post from the last few weeks.  1000 projects buzzing through my head.  I am so relieved that at 18 weeks pregnant I am starting to feel like a (semi) normal human being.

My unscheduled absence from the blog is entirely due to the pregnancy.  While everything is going as it should I have been utterly shocked to my core at the physical changes exerted on my body almost from the day I found out.  I shan't bore you with tales of relentless nausea or lists of the foods which I can no longer stomach or the bone crushing tiredness which comes on about two hours after I get out of bed and lasts for the rest of the day.  Suffice to say I thought I was prepared, planned and ready for all of this.  I was staggeringly wrong.

In between times though I have had bursts of energy (most have regrettably had to be channeled at work otherwise they are going to stop paying me.) others have been more creative.  Such as the following recipe which accompanied me to a glorious cheese and wine party on 2e kerstdaag. My apologies for the terrible photo.  It was a quick snap with the iPhone before the hoards descended.

IN THE KITCHEN: Pear and Cranberry Stuffed Camembert

INGREDIENTS:

1 pack of puff pastry (I found packs in the frozen section of the local Deen supermarket.  They were only available in packs of 10 small squares so I smooshed them all together re-rolled them and it worked just fine.  Of course, if you can find prerolled puff pastry so much the better.)

1 pear, peeled, cored and thinly sliced

2 tbsp dried cranberries

1 tbsp butter

2 tbsp light brown sugar

1 camembert

1 egg, beaten

DIRECTIONS:

Pre-heat your oven to 200 degrees centigrade.

Divide your puff pastry into two pieces. 

Roll out each piece to approximately 2-3mm thick on a floured surface.

Cut 1 piece into a circle approximately 2cm bigger than your camembert.

Cut the second piece into a circle approximately 6-7 cm bigger than your camembert, reserving the scraps for decoration.

Transfer the larger circle of pastry to a baking sheet covered with baking paper/parchment/a silicon slipmat.

Cut your camembert round in half and lay the bottom half on the large pastry circle, cut side up.

Heat the butter and sugar in a frying pan/skillet.

Add the pear slices and cook for 5 minutes turning gently until softened.

Add the cranberries and cook for another 2 minutes.

Carefully pile the pears and cranberries onto the cut side of the camembert.  Try not to get too much of the cooking liquid onto the pile as it will make the pastry soggy.

Place the remaining half of the camembert onto the pear and cranberry topped half, cut side down.

Brush the edges of the lower pastry circle with beaten egg.

Gently lay the larger circle of pastry of the pile of camembert and fruit.  Press the sides down carefully onto the lower circle of pastry.

Seal the two circles of pastry together by pressing the edges with a fork.

Brush the outside all over with beaten egg.

Bake in the oven for 20 minutes.

Set aside for 10 minutes before serving to avoid burning your mouth on molten cheese and also to stop the parcel collapsing into mush as soon as you cut into it.

OPTIONAL:

• Add 1/2 tsp of ground cinnamon or ginger to the pear and cranberry mixture whilst cooking it.
• Cut shapes out of the reserved pastry and "glue" them to the top of the parcel with more beaten egg before baking.  Don't forget to brush the tops of the shapes as well.
• Try substituting the pear and cranberry mix for 1 apple and 2 tbsp of sultanas or a small handful of raspberries with toasted almonds (you will not need to cook the raspberries and almonds in butter and sugar.  Just put them in "raw".)
• For an extra glossy finish, after you have brushed the pastry once with beaten egg set it aside for 10 minutes and then re-coat with another wash of beaten egg.

PLEASE NOTE:

In the picture I had just folded one large circle of pastry over the cheese and folded the excess underneath.  This was a BAD idea as it meant that I had a lot of thick pastry areas when it was cooked which is why I have modified the instructions above to a much better (in my opinion) method.

I am 1,064,016,000 seconds old.

I have lived in 15 houses across 5 countries and speak 3 languages with varying degrees of fluency depending on the day (Dutch is not one of them).

I have held down 6 jobs since leaving university 11 years ago.

I met my husband 42,168 hours ago, we were engaged 992 days later and married 295 days after that.

I am 13 weeks and 3 days pregnant.

In 187 days (give or take) I am going to be somebody's Mummy.

Of everything I have done, of everything I have achieved in my 12,316 days on the planet, this is by far the most terrifying and exhilarating that I have ever faced.

Excuse me while I just brush aside the tumble weed rolling past and scoot the dust bunnies into the corner.  Its been quiet round these parts recently hasn't it?  Maybe I have lost my Blog mojo.

I find myself lacking in inspiration.  The mundane tramps through my world with relentless frequency.  Furniture issues, check.  Boiler choosing to work only when it feels like it just as the weather changes?  Oh the joys of home ownership.  My blog is littered with half written draft posts.  The abadoned children of my skittish brain.  Somehow, the ducks on the canal are too captivating, other people's blogs are too compelling to get round to mine.

So tell me, those of you who are still reading along, what sparks your blog mojo, where does your inspiration come from to write those posts I enjoy reading so much on your blogs?

In the meantime, I'll be lifting the rugs to see where my mojo is hiding.

Via We Heart It

Sharon of the Expats Moving and Relocation Guide sent me a link to a giveaway she is hosting at the moment for a copy of Danielle Barkhouse's book - The Expat Arc: An Expat's Journey Over Culture Shock.

To win a copy of the book click here, and submit your expat story. 

I've been quite lucky and only really experienced culture shock in one of the countries I've lived in.  However, I know it can effect people quite deeply and isn't widely talked about which can make identifying it even harder.

Isabella over at Touch of Dutch has covered culture shock in great depth and if you want to know more about it and how she coped with it I would strongly recommend reading through her archives, in particular this post, which serves as a good diagnostic guide.